“Yawn...”
“...You look exhausted.”
The first half of Golden Week had ended, and we were back to the short stretch of weekdays sandwiched between the holidays. It was Tuesday. I was currently devouring some precious sleep—rather than just idly dozing—during our break, only for a familiar, gruff voice to disturb me.
“Well, yeah. I pulled an all-nighter.”
“What, were you buried in your part-time job again over the holidays? How many titles are you planning to offer tithes to this season?”
“Unfortunately, it wasn’t the job.”
Though, regarding the “offerings”—basically, the series I’d committed to buying the full Blu-ray sets for—there were five titles this season, so the fact that I’d eventually need to work my ass off at the job wasn’t technically wrong...
“In that case, want to hit up Akiba once the break starts? If you aren't working, you’re just gonna be clearing your backlog of anime and games from morning till night anyway, right?”
Those heartless words nearly sent my anger past the breaking point. The time spent on a day off, locked in my room from morning on with my clock and phone hidden, grinning like a madman while playing through a pile of games and binge-watching recorded anime... Do you have any idea how important that is?! How blissful those moments are?!
“I can’t. I’m not working, but I’m busy.”
Well, now wasn't the time to argue the fundamental essence of the matter, so I let it slide.
“Man, you’ve been such a flake lately. What, did you get yourself a waifu or something?”
“Why do you jump straight to ‘waifu’ instead of ‘girlfriend’?”
As I glared at him, I stole a quick glance toward the seat at the end of the row by the hallway.
“Nah, I’m totally fine with it being a girlfriend too. If you get a girl like that, introduce her to me. Knowing you, Tomoya, she’s gotta be a cosplayer, an aspiring voice actress, or a fujoshi, right? Call her friends and let’s have an offline meetup.”
“I have so many things I want to nitpick about that, but if I had to pick just one: you’re describing a mixer.”
Even so, just like always, not a single rumor had started about Kato and me. We’d been together every single day for the past two weeks, including weekends, and we must have been seen alone together on campus numerous times. Setting aside the fact that the whole school knew about my hobbies, there was definitely more to it than just that. It was like there was something... “safe” about her, in a sense. Or perhaps, she lacked anything “dangerous”...
“Welp, there’s the first bell. See ya, Tomoya.”
“Yeah, later.”
By the way, the classmate I was just talking to wasn’t Yoshihiko from the other day, but a guy named Kenji Miyoshi. Even in a galge, if you aren't trying to prepare a unique character sprite for every single person, it’s actually pretty easy to increase your number of pointless male friends like this.
* * *
“So, the setting is a castle town in a multi-dimensional fantasy world...”
The after-school classroom was unpleasantly dim thanks to a sky covered in thick clouds.
“And the heroine is a rookie idol who’s right on the verge of her debut...”
From outside the window came the needlessly violent sound of heavy rain pelting the sports field.
“Anyway, the protagonist is a freelance photographer who doubles as her manager...”
In this space filled with enough white noise to drown out even the smallest sounds, my voice was almost entirely buried.
“Oh, by the way, the heroine is cohabiting with the protagonist because he picked her up while she was wandering the streets with amnesia...”
My words, delivered with a heavy sense of being cobbled together at the last minute, vanished the moment they left my mouth.
“Then one day, the story begins when the agency president orders the protagonist to market her as an idol...”
“Hey...”
“The heroine’s parameters include Vocals, Dance, Visual, Dignity, Guts, Sexiness, Morals, and a bunch of others...”
“Um, listen...”
“And depending on how you raise her parameters, her profession in the ending will change in all sorts of ways...”
“Wait a minute...”
“Of course, there’s the S-rank idol, or she could be scouted by a king and become a princess. But if you raise her wrong, she could end up as a prostitute or a scammer. Oh, and naturally there’s an ending where she marries the protagonist—”
“Just shut up already!”
“Whoa, don’t yell so loud. You’re bothering the people around us.”
“It’s so loud outside that nobody can hear us anyway!”
“...True.”
At that exact moment, a beautiful flash of lightning and a violent roar of thunder echoed through the classroom. The timing was so perfect it was as if they were responding to Eriri’s roar of fury.
“Anyway, I’m going home. Once again, that was a perfectly seamless waste of time.”
“Wait, hold on. I still have a mountain of plans I haven't finished explaining...”
“That mountain has already suffered a total landslide at this stage.”
“Aw, come on.”
I was supposed to follow up with local tourism tie-in projects, rare cards, gacha, and an exploitative—no, dream-filled—monetization system combo.
“I thought you might have improved a little since the last presentation... What is this? It’s just a proposal that’s a complete rip-off of every raising sim, old and new!”
“The last one was mostly a rip-off too... I just changed the genre I was cribbing from.”
“That’s not an excuse! That’s just a confession of further crimes!”
Now then, I wonder how many games I mixed together for the settings this time?
“Even so... you leaned quite heavily into the system side of things this time, didn’t you?”
This time, it was Utaha-senpai who spoke up, her voice tinged with exasperation.
“Ugh...”
Eriri fell silent, becoming inexplicably grumpy, just like before.
“Well, I heard that you had a new serialization starting, Senpai, so I thought I’d try to reduce the burden of the scenario writing.”
“Though the fact that the content is complete nonsense remains unchanged from the last one.”
“...I see now that my concern was misplaced.”
She was definitely the person who, last weekend, gave me one more chance in that classic “kind smile after a verbal lashing” pattern that makes a guy fall for a girl.
“The last one felt like something you threw together at ten at night, but this one feels like you struggled with it until seven in the morning. To the point where your brain stopped working in the middle of the night, making it an even bigger jumbled mess than before.”
“Aw, man.”
Apparently, she only let me crawl back up so she could laugh as she ground me back into the dirt to satisfy her sadistic urges.
“So, what will you do, Rinri-kun? If you’re telling me this is a masterpiece you’ve refined to the very limits of your ability, to the point where there isn’t a single drop left to squeeze out of you, then I suppose I could try reading it a bit more seriously?”
“...I’ll bring another one, so please just look at the next version.”
Why does the logic of people with terrible personalities and high competence have to make a person feel so miserable?
Thinking that, I started to crumple the bundle of proposal papers in my hands to vent my frustration... before changing my mind and deciding I could use the back as scratch paper, tucking them into my bag instead. Gah, that half-aborted gesture only made me more stressed!
“Wait a second, are you seriously planning to make us sit through this again?”
This time, a voice of pure exhaustion layered over me from a different direction.
“Please, I’m begging you. I’ll bring the final draft for real next time.”
Well, Eriri also has a terrible personality and high competence, but since she doesn't have a very logical brain, she’s easier to deal with in that sense.
Oh, I’m not saying she’s easy to handle because she’s stupid or anything like that.
“Oh, come now, Sawamura-san, let’s go along with him one more time. It’s not like you have any events to attend for a while after the holidays, right?”
“I just hate being forced to go along with this pointless nonsense and having the precious time of my life ground away!”
“In other words, you’re afraid of having your life ruined by Rinri-kun?”
“I’m not afraid! Or rather, I don’t lead the kind of rotten life that could be derailed by an idiot like him!”
“Why am I the one catching flak when I wasn’t even the one making fun of you...?”
Honestly, she’s so simple-minded she’s impossible to handle.
“...This is really the last time, okay? There won’t be another.”
“Leave it to me. Have I ever lied to you before?”
“Countless times, starting with that DVD a week ago.”
“It’s uncouth to treat a joke and a lie as the same thing, Eririn.”
“I see. So that just now was a ‘joke’ and not a lie. Either way, I’ve confirmed that you deserve to die a thousand deaths.”
Good grief. Of the seventeen nicknames I gave her back in elementary school, I thought that was the cutest one. At least compared to ‘Eringi’ or ‘Eririn-gooo lol.’
“So, when is the deadline for this last chance, Rinri-kun?”
“...I’ll finish it during the break and bring it in on the first day back.”
“Well, I suppose that’s fine. No point in dragging it out any longer than that.”
That said, the deadline was actually quite generous. After all, it was Golden Week. There was a full week between now and the end of the holidays.
That was more than enough time for a single doujin game proposal, considering it wasn’t even a professional project.
“Well then, I’ll see you after the break—”
“Ah, one more thing, Rinri-kun.”
As I made to leave the audio-visual room with newfound resolve, Utaha-senpai stopped me once more.
“Yes?”
“Where is... she, today?”
“...!”
Being asked that gave me a small sense of relief, but for a moment, the words wouldn’t come.
“Oh, that’s right, that girl... whatever-her-name-is isn’t here today, is she?”
“Wait, didn’t you two become friends...?”
Just when I was starting to feel relieved that they at least acknowledged her existence, I got this.
“Well, I can certainly understand why Sawamura-san wouldn’t want to admit that girl exists, but...”
“Huh? What’s that supposed to mean? I have no idea what you’re talking about! This is exactly why I hate talking to you—you always make these weird assumptions!”
“Would you two just... no, never mind.”
The only thing these two had in common was me... so I had no choice but to stop trying to make sense of them.
“Fine, fine, I remember. Kato-san. Megumi Kato-san. Is she not here~?”
“She’s on a family trip for the holidays... to Hokkaido.”
If I stopped to snap back every time she acted like a brat, we’d never get anywhere, so I decided to ignore Eriri’s attitude.
“Oh? What, did you two break up already, Rinri-kun?”
“No, it’s not like that... and it’s not ‘breaking up’ since we weren’t even dating.”
“Well, Tomoya’s always been the lowest of the low—the type to fall hard and then lose interest just as fast,” Eriri added.
“Hold on, since when have I ever done that?!”
“I mean, a year ago with that certain light novel author...”
“You really do hold a long-standing grudge, don’t you, Sawamura-san?”
“Wait, Senpai, aren’t you the one egging her on...?”
Well, regardless...
Today, the usual household spirit was missing from the room.
And it seemed I wouldn’t be seeing her again until the deadline—not tomorrow, nor the day after.
* * *
“Eh? What? Sorry, I couldn’t hear you very well.”
“Are you in Sapporo right now? Sounds like it’s pretty lively over there.”
It was now Wednesday night.
Golden Week was finally about to enter its second half tomorrow—the day in May when we were supposed to be at our most festive.
“I told you, I can’t hear you! So, when did you say the deadline was?”
“The beginning of next week. I’ve got the whole break.”
“Wait, does that mean...?”
“Yeah, don’t worry about it. Just have a good time.”
It was a slightly disjointed conversation between me, for whom the holidays meant nothing, and Kato, who was already well into her vacation.
“I’m sorry, I feel kind of bad... skipping school right when things were getting important.”
Kato’s voice over the phone was a little hard to catch, muffled by the surrounding hustle and bustle of her location. Or rather, I felt like I wasn’t putting enough effort into trying to hear her myself.
“It’s the last trip you’re all taking as a family, right? That’s more important.”
Since the day before yesterday, Kato had been absent from school for a week-long trip to Hokkaido.
Her older sister, who was getting married this summer, had come up with the idea, and her fiancé had footed the bill. It was a final family getaway for the Kato household.
“Besides, your plans were set since last year, weren’t they?”
“U-Um, yeah, I guess.”
...I had heard that heartwarming story yesterday, not from Kato herself, but from a classmate.
“I’m the one who arbitrarily decided on the schedule for things over here yesterday, so there’s no reason for you to worry about it, Kato.”
We had simply each acted according to our own schedules.
There was absolutely no obligation for her to go along with the incredibly unreasonable selfishness of a friend she’d only met a month ago—none, zero, not even a shred.
“Um, are you sure you’re okay? Can you make the deadline on your own?”
“...I told you, why are you worrying about that?”
“No, it’s just, Aki-kun...”
And yet, my own voice sounded so pathetic it made me sick. Pathetic enough to make even Kato sound concerned.
“In the first place, even if you were here, you wouldn’t have anything to do.”
“Ahaha, well... I guess that’s true~”
“......”
Even this momentary silence was pathetic. Even though I was the one who had cornered her into saying that.
But that characteristic lightness in her response... it stung a little.
“Aki-kun?”
“Hmm? What?”
“Is it possible...”
“Anyway, I’m hanging up soon. I’ve got a deadline to meet, after all.”
“Ah, okay... But hearing words like that makes me feel like things are finally moving~”
“Hardly. We’re only at the stage of seeing if they even can move.”
“Ahaha, I guess you’re right... I trust you, Aki-kun.”
Trust, huh?
“I told you this before, Rinri-kun... before you try to motivate us, don’t you have something you need to do?”
“Something I need to do...?”
“It’s pointless unless you make her—unless you make Kato-san—serious about this.”
I was told... that I shouldn’t let her trust me. That I shouldn’t let her rely on me.
“What she lacks most isn’t ‘character,’ it’s motivation.”
“Well, I can’t argue with that.”
“...I’ll admit she’s a bit weak as a character, too.”
“Even the professional author is giving her the seal of disapproval...”
“But can’t you cover for that with a bit of enthusiasm?”
“......”
“I’m not enough of a genius—or a pervert—to make a heroine shine when she won’t even try to shine herself.”
The reason she lacked presence was that she didn’t try to show any presence. And that lack of motivation had been hidden behind her incredible agreeableness.
“In other words, if you’re dragged into it, then get serious... right?”
“Wait, that’s...”
“It’s a line some idiot used when he made an unreasonable demand of me at an event a long time ago.”
“Eriri...”
“Well, ever since then, I swore I’d never listen to another request of yours again.”
“What is this? You make it sound like a nice story, but it’s actually just a firewall?”
Because she was so easy to drag along, because she would go along with anything... Because she was so easy to lead by the hand if I just put a little effort into it, I had forgotten that she wouldn’t move on her own.
“Oh, by the way, for a souvenir... is Butter Sand okay?”
“It’s my favorite, so I’ll take two boxes. Ah, I’ll pay for them, but just for one box.”
“Ahaha, got it... Oh, but the shelf life is only a week. That’s cutting it close.”
“You can just buy them at the airport on your last day, can’t you?”
“Ah... right, I guess I can.”
But it’ll be fine...
I had intended to pull this off by myself from the start anyway, and I knew that was my only shot at winning.
So from here on, I just needed to keep leading the way.
After all, this project had started solely from my own feelings, and its purpose was to satisfy my feelings alone.
"Well, see ya, Kato..."
"Ah! Sorry, just one more thing."
"What is it?"
"Aki-kun, what was it... that you liked about me?"
"...Huh?"
And with that, Kato, who was proving quite reluctant to let me wrap this up cleanly on my own, brought up another baffling question as her self-proclaimed final query.
"Oh, no, I mean, like... 'It was fun when we did this,' or 'I liked this part of you,' or even the opposite, like, 'This part of you was really a letdown' is fine too."
"...Are you actually in a hospital bed right now? About to undergo a high-risk surgery with only a twenty percent success rate?"
What was with that question? She sounded exactly like a sickly heroine right before she enters a normal ending.
"No, I'm obviously not telling a lie that dramatic... So, how about it?"
Well, the fact that she wasn't flustered at all even while pressing me like this was classic Kato, so she probably didn't have any major hidden motives.
"Well, let's see... Honestly, all of it was pretty fun."
Over the past few days, we'd done things like chatting at coffee shops, pulling all-nighters playing video games, and going on trips together—a series of events that, under normal circumstances, you'd only expect from a newly dating couple.
It was literally a creepy otaku's wildest delusions come to life every single day.
There was no way that wouldn't be fun...
"So, no complaints?"
"Well, if I had to be just a tiny bit greedy..."
"If you had to be...?"
"...I thought it could have been a little more... suffocating, maybe."
Even so, a tiny sliver had slipped out. A rare piece of my true feelings, delivered casually without my usual dramatic exaggeration.
"Um, so does that mean you wanted me to be meaner to you?"
"Not even close. Besides, we already have more than enough of that with the other two."
"Hmm... I wonder how it's different?"
"Hey, Kato, seriously, what is this about..."
"Oh well, I'll think about the rest myself."
"Think about what?"
"Bye-bye, Aki-kun."
"Ah..."
And with that, Kato, who had dragged the conversation out for so long, abruptly and unilaterally hung up on me at the very end.
...Think about what, exactly?
* * *
And then, the next day.
Thursday, the start of the second half of the holidays.
Finally, the day our revenge would begin in earnest.
Title:
To Be Determined
...Even though the sun was already starting to sink in the west, the text file open on my laptop screen in front of me had only progressed by a grand total of two lines.
During that time, I had collapsed onto my bed exactly seven times.
However, with an iron will, I successfully resisted touching the cursed remote control that would tempt me to turn on the TV for anime or games.
...Well, in exchange, I ended up reading through more than ten volumes of manga.
Why is it that when you're procrastinating like this, you always default to series you've read over ten times and already memorized every single line of dialogue for...?
Title:
To Be Determined
Concept:
Prologue:
Key Selling Points:
Character Bios:
Heroine A (Name TBD)
As the sun went down, I made a massive leap of five whole lines.
...Yeah, I know. A proposal sheet that consists of nothing but headings is completely worthless.
But panicking right now wasn't going to magically squeeze any ideas out of my brain. The reason was perfectly clear: I had just eaten dinner.
With all the blood that should be going to my brain currently concentrated in my stomach, trying to brainstorm was a completely pointless endeavor.
"Therefore, just fifteen minutes..."
So, let's take a quick nap to aid digestion. If I got sleepy right when my brain actually started working, it would all be for nothing.
A fifteen... no, maybe a thirty-minute nap is the absolute best way to refresh the mind.
And with that, just a tiny bit of shut-eye. Goodnight.
The very next day.
Day two of our revenge: Friday.
"...Huh?"
In other words, a shocking turn of events where I woke up to find the date had already changed...
On top of that, because I had left the lights on, I didn't even feel like I'd slept well. In fact, why did it feel like I was even sleepier now than before I went to bed...?
"Yaaawn..."
So, to shake off the drowsiness, I booted up my web browser.
It happened to be my usual time for checking site updates, and there were various things I wanted to look up anyway.
Well, as long as I worked hard from now until morning, I could easily make up for the time I lost sleeping.
"Whoa, 4:00 AM..."
While acting all relaxed, I might have wandered around the web just a little too much.
Starting with my usual daily-check sites, I drifted to Twitter, 2channel, and Niconico, and finally ended up on a deep dive through Wikipedia's related links.
But it wasn't a waste of time. After all, I felt like I had absorbed a ton of highly useful information.
Plus, halfway through, I made sure to hop over to Uncyclopedia to gather some comedic material. In creative endeavors, this kind of steady, behind-the-scenes effort is absolutely necessary.
Even if it doesn't bear fruit right now, it's bound to come in handy whenever I launch some other project down the line.
...Well, whether one should be building up this kind of backlog when they're currently cornered by a deadline is certainly a matter of debate.
"Well, what now..."
More importantly, I needed to figure out how to spend this awkward time around 4:00 AM.
Even if I went back to the proposal now, dawn would break in no time. And today was still just the midpoint of a long battle that stretched through tomorrow and the day after.
Ruining my sleep schedule now would be a foolish move.
"Well, I guess I just have to force myself to sleep..."
I lay down on the bed and made sure to turn off the lights. Yes, I would not repeat the same foolish mistake I made during my post-dinner nap.
Closing my eyes, I quickly rearranged my schedule for tomorrow onward.
Tomorrow, I would wake up at the exact same time as a regular school day. Then, in the morning, I'd get my revenge for yesterday. In the afternoon, I'd merge back into today's planned schedule, getting back on track by tonight.
Yep, plenty of wiggle room left.
"What... the...?"
Why was it past noon?
There was no room for questions like, How did no one notice...?
It was simply because I hadn't reflected my vow to wake up at school-day-time on my actual alarm clock.
Shoot, this is starting to turn into a real quagmire.
"...I should go move around a bit."
Shaking my groggy head, I headed down to the entryway to put on my shoes for the first time in two days. I needed to breathe some fresh outdoor air and wake my body up.
"Oh, new releases."
When I stopped by a bookstore during my jog, the display tables were piled high with magazines and manga released at the end of April, making it look like a veritable treasure trove.
But this wasn't some unforeseen distraction. It was a calculated, level-headed decision based on the idea that getting some print into my eyes might spark some inspiration.
That was exactly why I had gone out of my way to walk to this bookstore in the next town over, where the manga weren't shrink-wrapped and you were free to stand and read them...
The absolute next day.
Day three of our revenge: Saturday.
...Only two days left to make a move before the deadline.
"Uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah?!"
The shock of having two whole days slip by in what felt like the time it takes to read five pages of a novel is truly beyond words.
On top of that, seeing that the laptop screen was still showing the exact same seven lines of empty headings from two days ago, shining in all their glorious, pathetic splendor... words fail me.
And so, from this point on, running away from reality was no longer allowed.
First, I shut off the wireless LAN router, blocking the entrance to the internet’s beaches.
Next, I powered down the TV and the HD recorder, declaring the virtual hiking trails strictly off-limits.
Following that, I cleared the anime and game cases piled on my bed and floor—which was really just recreating the mess they’d been in for weeks anyway—lined up my stockpile of bottled coffee on my desk, and stowed away the little boat that would tempt me toward dreamland.
There. I had no retreat left.
...Even if those preparations had cost me about two hours, I was sure that once the deadline passed, I would look back and laugh, telling myself it had been a necessary measure.
And so, this was where the final battle began...
“...Alright!”
Taking one deep breath, I dove headfirst into the only portal left in this room—the world of creation.
“Aha... Ahaha...”
And then, the day-of-the-week display on my clock joyfully changed to Monday...
I had the distinct feeling Sunday had been completely skipped, but that definitely wasn’t my imagination.
In other words, I had spent two whole days—about forty-eight hours—glued to my desk.
“Ahahaha!”
Time left until the deadline... maybe 0.3 days?
The text file open in front of me had yet to undergo any dramatic evolution from those seven lines. In fact, it hadn’t even taken one giant leap into an eighth line for mankind.
Granted, saying I hadn’t made a single line of progress was technically misleading.
It was a constant cycle of typing out lines, only to instantly delete them a moment later.
If this were an old-school writer’s room, there would undoubtedly be a mountain of crumpled manuscript paper in the wastebasket.
“Just one night left...”
Having come this far, the word I had been desperately avoiding finally crossed my mind.
That verb, with its sweet, narcotic ring: give up...
In truth, it wasn’t time to panic yet.
There was still a chance I could make it.
After all, in terms of sheer workload, a single proposal was something that could easily be whipped up in a night.
I had once heard from a popular author I knew.
She said that spending a lot of time on a creative idea didn’t guarantee it would be good, and conversely, a lack of time didn’t mean it would turn out low-quality.
She claimed that legendary, god-tier projects created in a single night actually existed in this world.
In short, there were neither limits nor baselines to human imagination—which ultimately boiled down to the harsh, brutal truth that success or failure was entirely a matter of talent.
Which meant, when I looked back and applied that to myself... the word give up began to seep into my mind again, just like before.
This past week had brought home to me, painfully and clearly, that I had no talent.
And not just the creative talent those two possessed, but also, in the end, their talent for hard work.
No, maybe it hadn’t just been this past week.
Back before the new semester started, during my initial feverish excitement, I hadn’t managed to get a plot together either.
Even after I met Kato again and my once-lost passion for creation was reignited, the only thing I had managed to produce was a poorly made, makeshift draft that Eriri easily crushed.
Besides, choosing that team was just as unrealistic as Kato said it was. I can’t even imagine those two—with their massive egos and nasty personalities—actually working together. ...Though, honestly, imagining them actually getting along is even scarier.
And besides that... more than anything, Kato doesn’t even seem interested.
One after another, excuses like these flooded my mind in an instant. In terms of word count alone, they’d already far exceeded the length of my actual proposal.
I’m starting to get it now... If I’m the only one who gives up, everyone else can be happy. If I just... give up...
—Say, Aki-kun... what was it about me that you liked?—
—...Huh?—
—I mean, like... did you have fun when we were doing certain things? Are there parts of me you like? Or, on the flip side, parts that were actually kind of a letdown?—
I want to ask her the same thing. Was Kato not having fun? Was it boring being with me...?
—Well... Kato.—
—Y-Yes?—
—I think you’re normally cute.—
—Oh, thanks. But that was so sudden it felt like your heart wasn't in it.—
—Yeah, I think so too. Just forget I said anything.—
—Oh, can I order something else? I’m getting a little hungry.—
—Yeah, order whatever you want. It’s all on me today.—
—Oh, thanks. Let’s see...—
—...Hm?—
That was a memory from a few days ago. It was our incredibly comfortable exchange at the cafe, right after my decidedly undramatic reunion with that “girl on the hill.”
But... wait, could this work?
“Well... Kato.”
“Y-Yes?”
“I think you’re normally cute.”
“...! N-No, wait... wh-whaaat?!”
“You don’t have to look so disgusted. I was complimenting you.”
“B-But still, do people normally say stuff like that to a girl’s face when they’ve barely just met?”
“—Ah... I guess that kind of thing really does creep girls out?”
“It’s not so much creeped out as...”
“—I mean, I don't have any tact, so I don't really get that stuff.”
“Yeah... yeah, it really seems like you don't get it at all.”
“—Look, I know I’m the one who said it, but you don’t have to agree so bluntly.”
“Because... first of all, thinking I looked ‘disgusted’ is a total misunderstanding...”
Wait, what?
Is this... actually moe? Just from tweaking the dialogue a tiny bit?
Just by making me sound a bit more like a sincere-yet-dense protagonist. Just by making Kato give a slightly more innocent reaction...
“You don’t have to look so disgusted...”...uh, what was next?
And so, I desperately chased after that moment where my heart skipped a beat. The sound of keystrokes, absent for so long, echoed through the room. The display began to fill with text for the first time in days.
Damn it, Kato... With just a little effort, you can actually be moe.
“It’s a promise, Kato... don’t go home yet.”
“—A-Aki-kun...”
“—Please!”
“—Well, I did tell my family I might be home late today, so a little longer is fine.”
“—It is?!”
Once again, I cross-examined myself. Why did I want to make Kato a galge heroine in the first place...? Why did I think I could turn her into the most popular girl—the kind who’s cute, has a strong personality, is charming, and makes every player want to call her their “waifu”?
...It was because it frustrated me that the current Kato wasn't like that, wasn't it? I felt destiny in our encounter. And yet, that destiny was denied by the girl herself. So, I wanted to take that betrayed destiny and set it right inside a game...
“Please!”
“............I really can’t.”
“—I-I see... Sorry. I shouldn't have asked something so unreasonable.”
“It really IS unreasonable! I can’t believe you’d suddenly say something like that!”
“—B-But, Kato, I really—!”
“Because I didn’t bring a change of underwear!”
“—...Huh?”
“No pajamas, no toothbrush, no hairdryer... I’d be a total mess tomorrow morning!”
“—Wait, what are you talking about?”
“—‘What are you talking about’ nothing! Girls have things they need to prepare!”
“—But if we keep saying stuff like that, we’ll never...”
“So... when are you going to ask me next?”
“—Eh...”
“—I’ll bring them next time. My things for the sleepover.”
“—K-Kato?”
“—So, Aki-kun... Tomoya-kun. You need to get ready, too.”
“—R-Ready for what...?”
“—Ready... to call me Megumi.”
I see... I finally get it. I had my heart broken by Kato. By having the image I’d dreamed up for her denied.
She showed me a girl who was too ideal as “just a friend”—someone without a strong hook, who’s laid-back, doesn't pander to otaku, but is incredibly tolerant—and in doing so, she gently dumped me.
—Aki-kun, you’re the weird one.—
—I keep telling you, you shouldn't talk about how abnormal she is right in front of her~—
—A popular illustrator and a hit author... Why is Aki-kun’s inner circle full of people like this?—
—Hey, look, it stays balanced precisely because a featureless girl like Kato is there.—
—Can we just leave me out of this? More importantly, stop forcing me into being the punchline.—
That’s why I wanted to meet a different Kato inside a game. It’s an act of substitution—fulfilling a dream in a game that won't come true in reality...
Well, damn. That’s basically the core of all creative work, isn’t it?
“—Tomoya-kun, you’re the weird one.”
“Why me?!”
“—A popular illustrator and a hit author... and they're both cute girls!”
“—Look, their jobs aside, whether they're cute or not doesn't matter right now, does it?”
“—But the fact that they're girls matters, right? And you kept them a secret from me until now!”
“—Even if you say that, I’m just a fan of the work. The authors themselves are irrelevant.”
“—And on top of that, you hid the fact that they both go to the same school!”
“—I told you, they asked me to keep it a secret...”
“—And! And! And! The look on Tomoya-kun’s face when you were reading this book! You looked so happy, so excited, and sometimes so pained, like you were about to cry... You hardly ever make faces like that when you're with me!”
“—Don't get jealous of a book...”
Yes... This was it. I wanted to have these kinds of embarrassing conversations with Kato.
Our usual banter was fun and very much like her, but I also craved these breathless, uncharacteristic conversations. I didn’t just want to have fun; I wanted to feel the pain, too. I wanted my heart to race more. I wanted her to be jealous.
It was... super moe...
* * *
“...Done.”
The time was 7:00 AM. Bright sunlight streamed through the window, and I could hear the morning-chirp sound effect. No, wait, those were just actual sparrows. On that serene Monday morning following the holidays, it was finally finished.
Well, calling it “finished” might be a stretch given how low the quality was; it didn't even look like a proper proposal document yet.
After all, the title was still “—TBD.”
The genre was just a single, cliché line: “—Pure Love Adventure.”
The character setting was a single line even more half-assed than before: “—Based on Megumi Kato of Class 2-B.”
"I-I did it...!"
Even so, as far as I was concerned, it was undoubtedly "complete."
Pivoting sharply from an incredibly simple explanation of the game's concept, a mountain of dialogue between the protagonist and heroine followed.
Detours on the way home from school, club activities in the classroom after hours, all-night gaming, anime marathons, walking to school together, weekend dates, strolling in front of the station, a dramatic confrontation at a café, long-distance phone calls from trip destinations, and a reunion after a week with a mountain of travel stories to share.
A chance encounter, an awkward first conversation, peaceful moments, nights spent talking passionately, mornings greeted while half-asleep, a slightly more awkward "good morning" than usual, getting yelled at for being three minutes late, hands holding naturally, first tears, loneliness thrown at each other, affection thrown at each other...
Events that, in reality, hadn't happened at all.
Events that might have happened if our paths had crossed just a tiny bit differently.
To anyone else, it would look like completely boring, self-indulgent dialogue.
But to the protagonist and the heroine, it was a priceless conversation where not a single word was wasted.
The only part that could be called complete was this sample script.
Looking at the big picture, it didn't look like a game proposal at all.
But that was fine.
Because this was content I could proudly declare as the very game I wanted to make...
"I'm off!"
In the end, without sleeping a wink, I left the house a whole hour earlier than usual.
I knew all too well that if I slept even a little, I'd end up dead to the world until evening. More than anything, I wanted to get to school as soon as humanly possible.
Because I wanted those two to see the finished plot as soon as possible.
No, that's not quite right.
Right now, there was someone else I wanted to show this to first.
If she read this text, where the source material was so obvious it basically screamed, "I'm using you as jerk-off material," what would she think?
...Well, knowing her, she'd probably only be slightly creeped out.
And then, after all was said and done, she'd probably give me a reassuring reaction like, "Well, maybe this works too?"
That feeling of relief and being slightly let down, which I hadn't felt in a week, suddenly felt incredibly nostalgic, and I put even more force into pedaling my bicycle.
As I accelerated for a while, following the road as it curved to the left, I reached a steep downward slope where my view suddenly opened up in all directions.
In other words, the usual Detective Hill...
"Huh...?"
And as I started down that hill, I let out a dumbfounded gasp.
Not because a sudden strong gust of wind blew from behind me.
Not because cherry blossom petals, far out of season, were fluttering down.
And of course, not because the sun was incredibly yellow...
Plop, tap, roll, roll... stop.
"......Huh?"
It was a white, perfectly round, Identified Rolling Object that stopped right in front of me, looking bigger and closer than the sun.
"Ah, ahhh! It stopped!"
".........Huh?"
And from behind me, a flustered voice arrived, unable to even ride the wind that wasn't blowing at all.
"I guess it really doesn't go the same way twice."
"Ah...!"
The white beret, stopped in the middle of the road.
And its owner, standing frozen at the top of the hill.
"Long time no see. We... met again. Quite a coincidence, huh? Ahaha..."
"K-Kato...?"
...And her bright, dazzling smile.
"Oh? So you do know who I am... Tomoya Aki-kun."
I had called her name, and she had called mine, but...
But this Megumi Kato was completely different from usual.
Her smile, her strangely alluring tone of voice, and the emotion-filled meaning behind her words.
Yet, without a doubt, this was the Kato I knew... no, she was the girl from back then.
Because of the white beret rolling down the hill, the white dress fluttering in the wind, and the white...
"K-Kato...? What on earth..."
What on earth was going on...?
Was this a hallucination brought on by my brain after three sleepless days, or was it a trick by the usual cherry blossom spirit?
"Well, you see... this is a do-over of fate."
"A do-over...?"
The girl in the white dress tilted her head and brushed her hair back.
It was different from her usual gestures.
But on her right now, it was a gesture that suited her perfectly.
"We had such a dramatic meeting back then, but things stopped being dramatic afterward. So this is our makeup exam."
"Makeup exam..."
Do-over, makeup exam... revenge, retry.
It evoked an intention I felt like I'd heard somewhere else quite recently.
"Why don't we create it? Our story from here on out... Let's make it together."
No way, is this...?
"Now then, let's start over from that part just now, okay?"
With that, Kato twirled in front of me.
The hem of her skirt fluttered gently, stealing away my eyes, my heart, and my breath.
"Oh, so you knew about me... I'm glad, because I thought I didn't stand out at all."
"Ah, no, I mean..."
"I know about you too, you know, Tomoya Aki-kun?"
"Huh..."
"...Well, of course I do. Unlike me, you're super famous."
"......"
I see.
So that's what this is...
"The maverick of Class 2-B, the hopelessly obsessive enthusiast, the most popular guy in school..."
"...What is that? That's terrible."
"Ahaha, well, I'm not the one who said it."
Troublemaker, shitty otaku, laughingstock... I see, it's all in how you spin it.
Ditching the harsh, unvarnished truth, and spinning it in a "moe" direction.
"Oh, that's right... I have to thank you."
"You don't have to, really..."
"Hey, crouch down a bit?"
"Huh? Like this?"
So, a do-over.
A roleplay for our ideal reunion.
"Hmm, a bit lower. Level with my eyes."
"L-like this?"
...Yes, this was just like what I was doing last night.
"Now, close your eyes."
"Wh—"
"Hurry!"
"Y-Yes!"
And what's more, the protagonist is...
"......"
"......"
"......"
"...H-Hey, Kato?"
"Okay! You can open your eyes now!"
"Wait, what on earth did you—"
"...Pfft."
"Pfft?"
"I-It doesn't suit you at all!"
"Huh? What?"
Where Kato was pointing... I reached up to touch my head and felt the texture of felt.
Taking it off, I saw it was the beret I should have just picked up and handed back to her.
"Ahahahahaha, sorry, even I can't defend this look."
"O-Of course you can't! It's a woman's hat!"
"Fufu, now that I think about it, you're right. Fufufufufu."
"Y-You... you're laughing way too much!"
She took back the beret she'd plopped onto my head and put it back on herself, still laughing.
"Sorry, sorry. Well then, I'll have to thank you in some other way."
"No, like I said, you don't need to thank me..."
"Then I'll take requests, so tell me anything you want."
"...Wait, what?!"
"...I can't promise I'll do *anything*, but I'll do my best to accommodate you, okay?"
That mischievous gesture, her voice which was clearer than usual, and her smile from the bottom of her heart.
Combined with an offer that left way too much room for wild fantasies, they pierced right through me in various places.
"N-No, wait a second, so suddenly..."
"Okay, you have five seconds. After that, the offer expires."
"Ehhh?!"
Kato—no, the heroine—had completely taken control of the pace.
"Four..."
"W-Wait a second!"
"Three..."
"I said wait!"
"Twooo..."
"I'm telling you, I need to prepare myself mentally..."
"O-o-o-o-o..."
"...Ah."
But a protagonist who’s constantly being led by the nose is no fun.
"...o-o-o-o-o—"
"............"
Actually, the story won’t move forward like that.
So, surely, this is where...
"...o-o-o-o-o! Hah, hah, haaaa..."
"...Are you okay?"
"Wait, what!?"
See? There’s no “Time Out” option in the menu.
"So, can I make my request now?"
"...Yes, go ahead!"
"In that case, Kato..."
And so, to that offer—which left far too much room for delusions—I responded with a request that left far too much room for delusions.
"Be the heroine of my work."
"Eh...?"
There was no need for a tacky clarification like, The model for the main heroine of the doujin game I’m making.
I couldn’t lean too hard into a joke like I usually did, either.
If I hit her with words and feelings this cringey—just on the verge of being over-the-top...
"...Yeah. Okay, I will."
"Kato..."
The path forward was revealed.
"That sounds like it might be fun. I’m actually getting excited."
"Yeah... I promise. Let’s do something amazing together."
It was almost the same instant decision as back then.
And even though I knew this choice was just acting...
"It feels like every day is going to be fun from now on, Tomoya-kun... Is it okay if I call you that?"
Even so, the impact this hit my heart with was far different from that time.
"Then, is it okay if I call you Megumi?"
"As for that... let’s stick with Kato for now."
"Why!? You get to call me by my name, but I don’t? That makes no sense!"
"Well... you’re used to girls calling you by your name, Tomoya-kun, but there aren't any other boys who call me by mine, you know?"
"No way. Gender equality. I’m definitely calling you Megumi."
"W-Wait, what!?"
"If you really hate the idea of me calling you by your name that much, I’ll stop. But in that case, you have to go back to calling me Aki."
From my usual perspective, this was “moe.”
And from my perspective today, my heart was throbbing.
"...You’re so mean, Tomoya-kun."
"Thanks for the positive response, Megumi."
This moment with Kato was so fun my heart felt like it was going to burst.
This was the conversation I’d wanted to have, yet we never could.
...That was exactly why this was the conversation I wanted to recreate in a game.
"Well then, I guess the contract starts now. I look forward to working with you, Tomoya-kun."
"Then, as proof of our contract..."
"Eh? What?"
And the event I wanted to recreate in the game, too...
"Megumi..."
We were already laughing at almost zero distance, but I closed the gap even further.
Yes, until that “almost” disappeared.
"Wait, seriously? This wasn’t part of the deal..."
"Whose deal?"
Well, it couldn't be helped if the deal had changed a little.
"B-But Aki-kun, you said you’d never feel lust for anything in 3D..."
After all, the current “me” had a character setting added to him that I’d just thought of this very second.
"Just the tip... no, I mean, just for one second."
"If it’s for a whole second, it counts as doing it completely!?"
A bit of an unreasonable tyrant. A bit of a spoiled brat. And a bit of... a pervert.
The typical galge protagonist who was nothing like me... probably.
"Anyway, come on, close your eyes."
"Eh, no, wah—?"
But I couldn't help it.
I hadn't slept for three days, after all.
So, you know, forgive me if my delusions ran a little wild...
"What do you mean ‘just for one second,’ you absolute scum of a protagonist!?"
"Gwaaaaaaaaah!!!"
At the same moment as that voice, a massive impact hit my neck, and the high-pitched screech of brakes reached my ears.
Well, the only person who would deliver a bicycle lariat while flying down this steep hill at full speed was a neighbor who’d lived in this town since childhood, just like me...
"I’m sorry, Kato-san. I only partially predicted that he would be such an indiscriminate, true beast."
And the only person who would use such an ominous metaphor while acting like they knew everything was a certain sharp-tongued novelist who was constantly pursuing new material and vocabulary...
As I endured their various attacks, my consciousness slowly began to haze over. Mostly due to sleepiness, though.
By the way, in the moment before I went down, I caught a glimpse of Megumi... Kato. For some reason, she was squeezing her eyes shut for all she was worth.
...Seriously, you’re way too much of a good sport.
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